Marriage trouble
I have been married almost 28 years. My husband left home to live with his parents 3.5 months ago after issues involving alcohol and legal issues
i was the one who brought the start of the legal issues which resulted in a 6 mo probation sentence for my husband. He chose to leave home and a teenage daughter behind. I had no idea he was leaving. He says we need to work on our marriage issues by talking and seeing each other.
It has been months and we still talk by phone 1-4 times a day, meet for lunch or dinner up to 3 times a week. We have spent 3 weekends together during these months also.
I feel very alone & need to know that we are working to get back together but see no progress since the start of our separation. I have visited 2 different counselors and felt that I was still lacking. I am a member of a Christian recovery group which helps the most. I am constantly reading Christian marriage help books. I know that I need to change and have been working deligently on it.
Neither myself or my husband want a divorce, but on my end I feel the need for more progress than has been made. I also have emotional needs that I pray to be met and still feel so empty
My husband won't go to counseling and has an extremely hard time just making simple decisions-even what to eat.
Do you have any advice-- today has been a particularly hard day for some reason. I know it is spiritual warfare.
A
i was the one who brought the start of the legal issues which resulted in a 6 mo probation sentence for my husband. He chose to leave home and a teenage daughter behind. I had no idea he was leaving. He says we need to work on our marriage issues by talking and seeing each other.
It has been months and we still talk by phone 1-4 times a day, meet for lunch or dinner up to 3 times a week. We have spent 3 weekends together during these months also.
I feel very alone & need to know that we are working to get back together but see no progress since the start of our separation. I have visited 2 different counselors and felt that I was still lacking. I am a member of a Christian recovery group which helps the most. I am constantly reading Christian marriage help books. I know that I need to change and have been working deligently on it.
Neither myself or my husband want a divorce, but on my end I feel the need for more progress than has been made. I also have emotional needs that I pray to be met and still feel so empty
My husband won't go to counseling and has an extremely hard time just making simple decisions-even what to eat.
Do you have any advice-- today has been a particularly hard day for some reason. I know it is spiritual warfare.
A
Views: 3
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mitch Temple on -
Syressa,
I would encourage you to go to Family.org to read articles on separation in marriage. You may also download a free booklet called When Your Marriage Needs Help by myself. Do a search to find these.
Also based on what you said about your husband having a difficult time making small decisions, it sounds as if he may be depressed. Encourage him to go a doctor. As long as depression is in a marriage, together or separated, it will make reconciliation more difficult. There are articles that can help you on the same website above.
I would encourage you guys to get professional help as well to help you through the separation process. Separation can often be helpful but usually only when the separation is structured and managed by a professional.
As difficult as your situation may seem, there is hope. You may also call 1800Afamily to receive direction from a licensed counselor for free and then a referral to someone in your area. The marriage forum on family.org is also a good place to talk to others who are going through the same situation.
I am so sorry you are going through this. I pray that the separation along with help you seek will bring reconciliation and peace to your marriage very soon.
May God bless you through this journey.
Mitch
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Permalink Reply by Syresa on -
Mitch,
I thanks your for your prayers and time. i went to family.org, but couldn't find the separation section.
In addition, my husband will not seek a counselor, but has agreed to attend a Christian marriage seminar for marriages in trouble.
Thanks again.
Syresa
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Permalink Reply by Mitch Temple on
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Syresa, I am happy to hear he is willing to attend the seminar. Is it called New Beginnings?
There is information which addresses when a spouse wont seek help at Familydynamics.net or Savemymarriage.com. Other great sites is Smartmarriages.com and Troubledwith.com (highly recommend).
Let us know how it goes with the seminar. I will be praying for you.
Mitch
Syresa said:Mitch,
I thanks your for your prayers and time. i went to family.org, but couldn't find the separation section.
In addition, my husband will not seek a counselor, but has agreed to attend a Christian marriage seminar for marriages in trouble.
Thanks again.
Syresa
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