Marriage in Trouble after 15 years
My wife is so hurt. I have emotionally and verbally abused her. She has been trampled on. I do not want a divorce. I have started to go to counselling and am going to the doctor soon to see if I need medicine. I have also prayed ALOT that God will take me into his hands and help heal me. My wife told me 5 months ago that she wasn't happy and didn't know if she wanted to stay married. We are still together, livinging in the same house. Sharing the same bed. We have 3 children together. I do not know what to do at this point. Nothing is changing. We are not getting better or worse. We are just room mates. I am so lonely. I simply just want to hold her. We did go see a counselor. He told her she was not ready for counselling and needed more time. What am I to do? I need advice. We have a good weekend, where we go to the store together, hang out and be a family. Then work happens and she is cold and keeps to herself. Please pray that God will heal my marriage as well as me and my wife. Thank you
Mark
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Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Mitch Temple on -
Mark you and your wife will be in my prayers in the days to come. My wife and I were working with a young couple in our home recently and saw that same famailiar fear in their eyes. Yet those of us who have been through the storm can honestly say no matter how hopeless it seems- hope lives and breathes. Grab slivers and glimpses and hold tight. Humble yourself before God before and he will lift you up. Complete brokeness and humility in one spouse is difficult for the other to ignore and not be moved by.
Mitch
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Permalink Reply by Mark S on -
Thank you. Your woeds are comforting. It seems some days she gives me great hope and other almost none. I used to love roller coasters but this is one roller coaster ride that I am not enjoying. I continue to pray everyday and reach out to others for help when I can. I have realized that I have grown to love my wife unconditionally but have not shown her that. It is very hard to not show her all that I have learned and would like to implement in our marriage. Thank you for your prayers.
Mark
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Permalink Reply by Cory McDonald on -
Mark,
My wife and I are praying for you and your wife.
I have been through the storm and I assure you no matter how hopeless it seems hope lives and breathes (as Mitch said). In my marriage the key to it being reconciled and "fixed" was obviously God, but it took absolute humility and brokenness on my part. I was verbally and emotionally abusive to my wife and in my arrogance didn't think anything I did was wrong and thought that my marriage was on the verge of divorce because of my wife. After I was broken and on my knees before our gracious King the healing in my marriage began.
Be patient! The one thing that hurt the healing process in my marriage was that I wanted results now. Once i concentrated on God and serving Him things in my marriage began to get life again.
I will be praying for you and your wife brother.
Cory
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